The Essence of Happiness

Now sometimes people confuse happiness with pleasure... from my point of view, the highest happiness is when one reaches the stage of Liberation, at which there is no more suffering. That’s genuine, lasting happiness. True happiness relates more to the mind and heart. Happiness that depends mainly on physical pleasure is unstable; one day it’s there, the next day it may not be.

One interesting thing about GREED is that although the underlying motive is to seek satisfaction, the irony is that even after obtaining the object of your desire, you are still not satisfied.. The true antidote of greed is contentment. If you have a strong sense of contentment, it doesn’t matter whether you obtain the object or note; either way, you are still content.

Whether our action is wholesome or unwholesome depends on whether that action or deed arises from a disciplined or undisciplined state of mind. It is felt that a disciplined mind leads to happiness and an undisciplined mind leads to suffering, and in fact it is said that bringing about discipline within one’s mind is the essence of the Buddha’s teaching.

(The Essence of Happiness – Dali Lama – From “A Guidebook for Living)

GET GOOD AT ASKING

"He who asks may be a fool for five minutes. He who doesn’t is a fool for a lifetime,” goes the wise Chinese’s proverb. It makes me think I an ad I read in the classifieds recently that said, “To the beautiful woman in the brown suede coat at the chemist at xyz on Saturday, November 28 @ 4pm. You bumped into me in front of the magazine section. I would love to meet and chat”. The man who placed this ad then left his phone number. Destiny had given him an opportunity – possibly to meet the woman of this dreams – and he had squandered it. And now, after regretting the fact that he “did not ask” he has had to resort to placing an ad in the newspaper in the desperate hop of finding this woman.

The more you ask, the more you get, but it takes practice to get good at it. Success is a numbers game. As the Buddhist sages observed, “Every arrow that hits the bull’s eye is the result of one hundred misses”. Over the coming weeks, flex your “asking muscles” by asking for a better table at your favourite restaurant, for a free second scoop at your local ice-cream shop, or for a complimentary upgrade on your next airline flight. You might be surprised at the abundance that will flow into your life when you just ask sincerely for the things you want.

Remember, the person who asks for what he wants at least has a chance of getting what he wants. The person who does not ask has no chance. “It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it”.

By Robin Sharma (Who Will Cry When You die?)

MASTER YOUR TIME

MASTER YOUR TIME
I have always found it ironic that so many people say they would do anything for a little more time every day, and yet they squander the time they already have. Time is life's great leveller; we all have the same allotment of 24 hours in a day. What separates the people who created great lives form the also- rans is how they use these hours.

Most of us live as if we have an infinite amount of time to do all the things we know we must do to live a full and rewarding life. And so we procrastinate and put the achievement of our dreams on hold while we tend to those daily emergencies that fill up our days. This is a certain recipe for life regret. As novelist Paul Bowles once wrote:

.......because we don't know (when we will die), we get to think of life as an inexhaustive well. Yet everything happens only a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even that. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that's so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more? Perhaps not even that. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.

Commit yourself to managing your time more effectively. Develop a keen sense of awareness about how important your time really is. Don’t let people waste this most precious of commodities, and invest it only in those activities that truly count.

GET BEHIND PEOPLES EYEBALLS

One of the deepest of all the human hungers is the need to be understood, cherished, and honoured. Yet in the fast paced days we live in, too many people believe that listening involves nothing more than waiting for the other person to stop talking. And to make matters worse, while that person is speaking, we are all too often using that time to formulate our own response, rather than empathizing with the point being made.

Taking the time to truly understand another’s point of view shows that you value what he has to say and care about him as a person. When you start "getting behind the eyes balls; of the person how is speaking and try to see the world form his perspective, you will connect with him deeply and build high trust relationships that last.

We have two ears a done mouth for a reason: to listen twice as much as we speak. And having the courtesy to be a better listener has another advantage: Since you are not doing all the talking, you are doing all the learning, gaining access to information you would have missed had you been engaged in the usual monologue. Here are a few practical tips to become better at the art of listening:

1. If you are speaking and the person you are having a conversation with has not said something within the past 60 seconds, there is a good chance you have lost her and it’s time to stop talking so much.

2. Resist the temptation to interrupt. Catch yourself just before you do so and pay more attention to the content of what the other person is saying to you.

3. After the other person makes her points, rather than immediately responding with your opinion, reflect on what you have just heard. Saying something such as, Just to make sure I understand you, are you saying.....?" And doing so with complete sincerity will bring you much closer to the people you interact with every day of your life.

(Who will cry when you die - Robin Sharma)

The Poem I wrote when Dad Died

FARWELL DAD

(My Dad – Jan Jantzen)

My father was a Master Chef and worked into his prime
He worked hard everyday and night and he was always on time
He walked to work in weather both foul and both fair
He worked long into his fulfilled life until he had white hair

My dad would stand all day and night in front of a hot flaming stove
With pots and pans and food galore,
Thrown around a creation was wove

Bellows could be heard by dad from the kitchen far and near
“Get out of my bloody kitchen – Can’t you see I’m in top gear”?
Flames from the stove produced beads of sweat
But not once did he ever voice any regrets

Into his pan he would create his famous master piece
Then add a bit of this and that which went down like a treat
Then on the plate he would then create this unbelievable dish
This man-made creation right from his hand
Revealed creations so so lavish

He made meals for the public to line up to eat
And every night for us, this was a treat
He also made meals for his family – 3 meal courses
He made meals for all our childhood friends
He made meals that could feed 100 horses

My father raised 2 kids
He shaped them too as the food he did
He moulded them to be generous and kind
Tempered by his love and by his design

He instilled in them a sense of right and wrong
He prepared them for the life ahead and to be strong
He gave to each of them whatever it was that he had
And made them proud that he was their dad

My father worked until the night he fell asleep
And then silence engulfed our little Yamba town - we all wept
The banging and crashing we all got to know so well
Had stopped inside his kitchen
But since I am my father’s daughter, time will only tell!

Give 'em a hug, a great big kiss.
Because one day, he will be greatly missed.

Now I will have to look up at the stars and
say, "I love you, Daddy, more and more each day
For if you keep these moments, you will never be apart
And my daddy will live forever locked safe within my heart.


By Jessica Jantzen

Books I Love to Read

Excuses Begone! Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Change Your Thought Change Your Life - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Inspiration - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace - Dr. Wayne. W.Dyer

Chicken Soup for the Soul - Jack Canfield & Mark V Hansen

Who will Cry when you Die - Robin Sharma

The Three Keys to Self-Empowerment - Stuart Wilde

The Secret - Rhonda Byrne

The Power of I AM - Johna Maxwell Taylor

You Can Heal Your Life - Louise L. Hay

The Chemical Maze Shopping Companion - Bill Statham

The Essence of Happiness - The Dalai Lama & Howard C Cutler

Ask your Guides Connecting to Your Divine Support System - Sonia Choquette

How to DevelopYour Sixth Sense - David Lawson

Calm Kids - Massage Stories for Children by Tricia Riordan